Sunday, June 16, 2013

Father’s Day—A Response


I always find myself sad around Father’s Day. Yes, I still battle periodic bouts of anger at my own father. He gave up on life at a relatively early age and finished his race poorly, leaving behind unfinished business and unspoken wisdom that went to the grave with him. I strive to break this pattern.

Perhaps this is part of the reason why come Father’s Day I recount my own failures as a father, I replay missed opportunities and fight away the “if only” game in the wee hours of the morning. Being a father is a tough gig; there’s no manual or how-to book; and most of the examples in the parenting books or family-oriented ministries are from “perfect” families with average problems. Or at least that’s the way it seems.
 

But Hold On
But still my boys love me. My bride listens to my pity-party rants then replies gently that I’m not alone and that I’m loved. So maybe I’ve misunderstood fathering. Maybe it’s less the doing and more the being—being a father, being there for my boys, and being there for my wife. Even in all my failures in not “doing” things right I was still being the best father I knew to be. My father hated his father; he never even talked about him. So apparently my father didn’t have the best example. But my dad was there, being the best father he knew to be. We didn’t play catch much and we didn’t go camping, but he came home every night, kissed my mom and patted me on the head.

Maybe that’s the legacy my father gave me, while he finished his race poorly, he was still being the best he knew as I was growing up.  So now, in the strength of the Lord, Whom my father didn’t know, I will continue being the best father I can be; I will carry the legacy of my father and take it to the next level. Then when the torch of life is handed off to my boys, they then can go even higher.

Being Dad 
Maybe that’s what being a father is all about, being there and being the best I know how, even through my weakness. Jesus said he would never leave me and he exhorted Paul that, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (Matthew 28:20 and 2 Corinthians 12:8).

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